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Rabbi Arthur Segal’s love of people, humanity, and Judaism has him sharing with others “The Wisdom of the Ages” that has been passed on to him. His writings for modern Jews offer Spiritual, Ethical, and eco-Judaic lessons in plain English and with relevance to contemporary lifestyles. He is the author of countless articles, editorials, letters, and blog posts, and he has recently published two books:

The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew

and

A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud

You can learn more about these books at:

www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org
ALL ENTRIES ARE (C) AND PUBLISHED BY RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL, INC, AND NOT BY ANY INDIVIDUAL EMPLOYEE OF SAID CORPORATION. THIS APPLIES TO 3 OTHER BLOGS (CHUMASH, ECO, SPIRITUALITY) AND WEB SITES PUBLISHED BY SAID CORPORATION.
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Thursday, November 12, 2009

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL:JEWISH RENEWAL:Toledot:two nations inside Rebecca:Jacob+Esau

 
RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL:JEWISH RENEWAL:Toledot:two nations inside Rebecca:Jacob+Esau
 
Jewish Spiritual  Renewal:Shabbat:11/21/09:A Path of Transformation
 
Shalom my Beloved Chaverim, Talmidim, v' Rabbanim:
 
Baruch ha Ba to our class' new members. You can access last week's class at this link. In this link will be links taking you back to prior classes and how to get class materials online.
 
Live in such a way that those who know you, but don't know God, will come to know God, because they know you.

There is a modern Midrash of a Jew praying to God. The Jew prays and God answers with blessings. But the Jew asks, "If you are giving me blessings, why do you give them in such flimsy packages with so many strings attached?"

And God answers, "If you are giving me your innermost heart in prayer, why in such thick layers of ego? Why with such cold words? Why do you hold back your tears?"

"I'll make you a deal," God continues. "You bare your soul from its wrappings, and I will bare My blessings of their clouds."
 
The above short conversation with God, shows us how our ego, Edges God Out of our lives. Ego allows us to rationalize, lie to ourselves, that we are doing good, when we really are not, or that the ends justifies the means.

 
When we truly come to the conclusion that our time in this earthly plain is finite and quite short, we hopefully begin to develop meaning and spirituality in our lives. Life no longer becomes ''all about me.'' We ask ourselves, and answer honestly, "If I did this mitzvah, with a paper bag over my head, so that I did not get kudos from others, would I still do the mitzvah?'' If we cannot answer with a resounding 'Yes,' then we are still living a life of selfseeking and not of altruism.
 

''A small act done modestly is a thousand-fold more acceptable to God than a big act done in pride.'' (Orhot Tzaddikim, 15C ) Those of you who study with me one- on- one know that I will never accept a 'thank you.' In fact I turn every ''thank you'' back to you, and say ''I thank YOU.'' A truly humble person, knowing that his mitzvoth are commandments and not suggestions, doesn't accept kudos and attaboys. And compared to a truly humble person, my little finger is just learning humility. I have to pray and meditate for some semblance of humility  three times a day, and I still slip often.

The Zohar teaches that we all have the choice to define our lives. The Zohar explains how every one of us  accounts for his usage of the days we were given. While again, I may wax ethereal, each Day testifies: "This is how you used me." Each Day we live can become a spiritual, eternal reality. Each Day is a creation of our own mind, body and spirit. No Day, and no deed,  is insignificant.
 
We learn to negate our ego, and live a Jewish Spiritual Renewal life of altruistically doing good and helping others. Isaiah writes: "Your light will shine even in the darkness, and your deepest gloom will be like the noon" (Is. 58:10).
 
The sages speak of an 'osek.' An osek is not just one who  does acts of chesed, kindness occasionally. An osek is one who makes this his/her way of life. When I talk about living  a life of being free, full of joy and happiness, this level of spirituality comes as we become osek. In fact the Talmud teaches that an osek is so constantly involved in doing spiritual deeds, he is exempt from other mitzvoth. ''Ha-osek be-mitzva patur min ha-mitzva--one who is already actively involved in performing one mitzvah is exempt from other mitzvoth (Talmud Bavli Tractate Sukkah 25b).''  In fact a true Osek, who knows Torah and Talmud, is even exempt from prayer and going to a synagogue. (Talmud Bavli Tractate Shabbat 11a)
 
The Chazal  (Chachameinu Zichronam Livracha--Our Sages of Blessed Memory), in the Talmud teach that Joshua was chosen as Moses successor, and not Moses' sons, because  Moses' sons ''sat and studied and were not osek b'Torah.'' Joshua, on the other hand, ''would come early to study, leave late, and arrange the benches and cover the tables.'' While it is great and a mitzvah to be a Talmud Torah, a student of Torah, we must teach Torah by our words and actions. We must be ''ameilut b'Torah.'' We must toil in Torah. When we take the word, to toil, l'amal, and use it as an acronym, we arrive  at ''limod al menat melamed--- ;earn and teach. '' We must teach Torah not just via study, but by acts of chesed, to raise one spiritually.
 
"Ein omer lashon ha ra ad shekofer b'ikar . One who speaks lashon ha ra has denied God's existence." (Talmud Yerushalmi Tractate Peah). Did you ever wonder what Adam's real sin was? Adam had a Torah of only one MItzvah. Just one!  Adam, the first man, ate from the Eitz Hadaat, the Tree of Knowledge. God told him, "Vatochal min ha'etz asher tzivisi lemor lo sochal mimenu -- You ate from the tree from which I commanded you not to eat."
 
In this verse we find a seemingly superfluous word,"lemor, to say." What is meant by that word? Rabbi Forshlager pointed out that this little word "lemor" means that God  told Adam to talk constantly about it, to constantly repeat the din, the law,  that one is prohibited from eating this fruit. This was Adam's Whole Torah. And his mitzvah was that he was to constantly repeat it: "lo sochal mimenu; Do not eat it!"  God told Adam that he violated this mitzvah because he did not talk about it! Had he done so, and constantly repeated God's commandment both to himself and to Eve, the sin of the Eitz Hadaat would never have happened.
 
So we can use our tongues for good or for bad. The choice is ours.
 
Judaism is not about getting our spiritual gas tank filled up at a weekly feel- good Shabbat service...or for many monthly or yearly.  Judaism is not about being kind to a neighbor or a group of neighbors on Sunday, and then ignoring  other folks on Monday.  When we live a truly spiritual life in all of our daily tasks and encounters, each day we have on earth, has the same joy and happiness, when that Day, testifies "This is how you used me.'' My dear ones, please recognize  that you have the courage within you to fulfill the purpose of your birth. Summon forth the power of your willinness and live the life of your dreams.

Our Sages reveal the source of our unwillingness to achieve the behavior of an osek: R' Shimon ben Lakish said: A person's Yetzer ha Ra threatens to overpower him every day and seeks to destroy him, as it is written, "The wicked one looks out for the righteous person and seeks to slay him" (Ps. 37:32). And if not for God Who assists each person, he would be unable to withstand it, as it is written (Ps. 37:33), "God will not forsake him to his hand, nor condemn him in His judgment" (Talmud Bavli Tractate  Succah 52b).

The above verse refers to the yetzer ha ra as a ''tzopheh'', a lookout. A military lookout uses binoculars which make objects that would appear small to the naked eye, bigger. He can magnify. At the same time, modern military lookouts, have radar and other devices, like satellite imaging, which can make a large object appear like a dot. They minimize.

As a rabbi, with post doctoral study in Psychology at the U of Penn, I can teach you that we humans, when we are not being spiritual and truthful to ourselves, do the same things. We magnify what is unimportant, like a verbal slight with which someone may taunt us. We minimize what is important, such as cheating in our business' or gossiping, telling ourselves these are unimportant for us to be concerned about, as ''everyone does it.''

In Psychology we call this ''awfulizing'' and ''minimizing.''  Our Talmud discusses the same.

The Yetzer ha Ra, which is extremely clever, operates in a similar way. When the Yetzer Tov (positive inclination) encourages us to perform a good deed, the Yetzer ha Ra discourages it. If our evil inclination is not at first successful at leading us astray, then it tries to minimize its importance, so that  we will approach the mitzvah spiritually- blinded with no joyousness. 

Conversely , our yetzer ha ra leads us to miss the mark, chet, (sin), when it magnifies our will's puny desires and leads us to do them, while we step on the toes of others. Then it minimizes the chetim we are doing, convincing us we are not sinning at all. And the yetzer ha ra, brings along his buddies: anger, resentments, selfishness, fears, lust, pride, et.al. to lead us on the way to separate ourselves from God and our fellows.

Then we want to change our ways, our Yetzer ha Ra, takes the same defects that it told us where 'nothing,' and tells us they are really bad, and we are so far gone, we cannot change. Our Yetzer Tov reminds us that the ''gates to renewal are always open.'' 

How many times when we are about to speak lashon ha ra, our yetzer ha ra magnifies the severity of the subject's misdeed, if there was a true misdeed at all (!)?  We become convinced that the subject is a rasha (evil person) and that it is a mitzvah to gossip about him or her. In reality, a spiritually renewed  person should take the opposite approach. We should discern our fellow with favor  and minimize any perceived, (real or unreal) wrong doings and keep our mouths shut.

"People were given two ears and one tongue so that they may listen more than speak." ''But how can you say, 'It was only talk, so no harm was done, by gossip?' Were this true, then your prayers, and words of kindness, would be a waste of breath." (Rabbi Nachman of Bratislava).

Learning to get control over our Yetzer ha Ra, and learning to make each day count, are two of the many things we will learn in Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew.  You will learn how in the middle of tumult and chaos, to be able to have shalom inside of you. Rabbi Nachman, who I tend to refer to many times, teaches: ''All new beginnings require that you unlock a new door."  The Path will give you the Key that you already own to the door that is already a part of you. Ha Emet, the Truth,  is within you; do not have to search for it elsewhere.

Let us turn to the text with the beginning of Chapter Two.

(001) The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal - Rabbi Arthur Segal

http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/product.sc;jsessionid=1AAD298F635FC0CDB0E40D45B4556F39.qscstrfrnt03?productId=1&categoryId=1

 

Before you can convince yourself that you want to renew your Jewish Spirituality, you must convince yourself that life without God is not worth living.

Those who proudly proclaim to be atheist or agnostic have never truly thought about what they are missing without belief in a Higher Power. We have found plenty of reasons to deny God and to live without Him. We have seen wars fought in His name throughout history. "Deus vult" (God wills it), said Pope Urban II and the cruel Crusades began. The religions of the world all claim to know the way to God or the way into Heaven, and all of them speak of peace and love of thy neighbor, yet we see almost nobody practicing this. So we throw up our hands and say, "I've had it with all this God stuff!" But this is the folly of humans, not of God. He hasn't gone anywhere. It is the religions and people who have lost their way.

 

As the catering staff clears up after Adam's bar mitzvah party, they notice that one of the gold spoons is missing – and it is the one that was placed at Rabbi Bloom's seat. They report the missing spoon to the hosts, Moshe and Sadie.

"Can you believe it, Sadie?" says Moshe. "But how can we call our Rabbi a goniff (thief)? We'll just have to keep quiet about it."

A year later, Moshe finds himself standing in line next to Rabbi Bloom at the bagel store. "Moshe, I'm glad we've met," says Rabbi Bloom. "It has been such a long time. I feel that you've been avoiding me. Is there a problem, Moshe?"

Moshe replies, "Now that you ask, Rabbi, I've been avoiding you ever since we discovered one of our gold spoons missing from Adams's party."

Rabbi Bloom says, "But why didn't you ask me about this? I put the spoon in Adam's tefillin bag. He obviously hasn't opened it since his bar mitzvah day!"

 

When we live a life without God we are letting our will direct us. The problem with this is that our will is derived from our wants and our desires and leads to a self-serving life. We can rationalize and say that we are doing some societal good when we yearn to be president of the Sisterhood of a synagogue, but if our will is directing us, we will invariably come into conflict with somebody else's will.

In Judaism our selfish will is called the "yetzer ha ra" (evil inclination). If we let the yetzer ha ra direct our lives instead of God, we will find ourselves living like dogs, always having to mark and protect our territory. We'll see the world as a giant pie and ourselves in competition with everybody else for a piece. If we see somebody with a piece of pie we don't say, "Well, good for that fellow. He has his piece of pie." Instead, we look at him and say, "I want that piece of pie." On the other hand, if we manage to get ourselves a slice of that coveted pie, we guard it to keep for ourselves rather than share.

 

Two beggars sit on a pavement in Ireland, each holding out a hat in which to collect contributions. One wears a large Cross around his neck, the other, a large Star of David. Passersby lift their noses at the Star of David, but drop money in the other beggar's hat and soon it is full while his neighbor's remains empty.

A priest who has been watching from nearby approaches the two beggars and speaks to the one with the Star of David. "Don't you realize that this is a Christian country? You'll never get any contributions wearing a Star of David."

The beggar with the Star of David then turns to the beggar with the Cross and says, "Hymie, look who's trying to teach us marketing!"

 

Selfishness is more than not sharing material things with others. It is a self-absorbed life in which everything is "all about me." Anyone who intrudes upon our selfish will makes us angry. Rather than let others enjoy the game with us, we take our ball and go home.

Self-seeking is a bit different. It means that everything we do is with an eye toward our own benefit. When we do things that on the surface appear to serve others, such as sitting on a board or heading a committee, our ultimate objective is often to receive something in return. You can usually spot these folks by looking at a synagogue bulletin. The same names are always there. The synagogue's motto may say that it is inclusive, but few are ever allowed to break into the clique that runs it.

There is no altruism in the life of a Godless person. Hence, living a life at the mercy of our selfish will puts us in conflict with others and makes us the foolish servant of, instead of a leader to, those who understand the truth. We live a life of delusion, running with people we believe to be friends, but are as self-seeking as we are, and are looking to get something from us just as we are from them.

When we live a life without God, we are dependent upon our finite selves and upon other finite humans who will invariably let us down. Even the most pious person can disappoint in one way or another. Hypothetically, Gandhi himself might promise to give you a ride to your doctor appointment, and then stand you up because it was his day of fast or for some other reason. Besides, I don't think Gandhi had a car so what's he doing promising to give you a lift in the first place?

If we depend on our finite selves, we will always fall short of the mark. We might think that we can love our fellow man without believing in God. But sooner or later someone will annoy us so much that we just can't get past our yetzer ha ra to love this person. We might think that we can be honest without God, but it is possible that sooner or later our accountant will point out a gray area in the tax code and we will choose to take advantage of it. Our yetzer ha ra will rationalize to us that if there was ever a self-serving, Godless bunch with a big yetzer ha ra problem it's the U.S. government, and they certainly don't deserve our money!

 

Rabbi Rabinovitz's phone rings. He answers, "Hello?"

"Hello. Is this Rabbi Rabinovitz?'

"It is."

"This is the IRS calling. Can you help us?"

"I'll try."

"Do you know Sam Cohen?"

"I do."

"Is he a member of your congregation?"

"He is."

"Did he donate $10,000 to the synagogue rebuilding fund last year?"

"He will!"

 

Our finite selves may have strong willpower and strong self-knowledge. Sooner or later we will come up against something in life such as a major fear or situation that our finite selves simply cannot handle.

When we depend on only our finite selves our source of dependence has boundaries. This is why I use the term finite. Adding other finite humans to the mix only makes things worse. We are likely to find them lacking and usually end up having resentments.

Next week, we will study more of Chapter Two of 

(001) The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal - Rabbi Arthur Segal

http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/product.sc;jsessionid=1AAD298F635FC0CDB0E40D45B4556F39.qscstrfrnt03?productId=1&categoryId=1 

A d'var Torah for the Shabbat of November 21, 2009 follows.

 
Many Blessings,
Rabbi Arthur Segal
www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA
 

Parasha Toledot: Genesis 25:19-28:09

Many Blessings,
Rabbi Arthur Segal
www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

"We Are Family; Get up Ev'rybody and Sing"

Parasha Toledot deals with different people's various needs. We often find that our needs conflict with others' needs. Some characters in this parasha deal with their needs assertively and therefore appear "needy." Most of them, however, use manipulation and deceit, refusing to admit their needs. This makes them appear strong on the outside when in reality they are the weak. Their lack of assertiveness leads them to sin and dysfunction, which, as we will read in later chapters of the Bible, has disastrous effects on our people's history.

Two main characters begin to show their different needs while in their mother's womb. Rebecca felt Esau and Jacob "agitated within her" (Gen. 25:22). God told her that she had "two nations" inside of her, and that the "elder shall serve the younger" (Gen. 25:23).

Note that the text says: "God said to her." (Gen. 25:23). Rebecca has a need to avoid displeasing Isaac so, according to the Midrash, she kept this news from him. As we will read at the end of this parasha, because Rebecca did not tell Isaac what God had revealed to her about their sons, Isaac is never able to imagine Esau as not being equal to the task of receiving his birthright.

Rebecca does not vocalize her fears that Isaac will abandon her for fear that he will assume that she is a sinner for having warring twins in her womb (as posited by the Maharal - Rabbi Yehudah Loewe of 16th-century Prague). Instead, she later conspires to steal Esau's birthright and give it to Jacob. From the moment Rebecca finds out about what is growing in her womb, and decides not to tell Isaac, her relationship with her husband becomes one of deceit.

Isaac's favorite son is Esau. Rebecca's favorite son is Jacob. What if Rebecca, who was brought to Isaac when she was three years old, was able to say that she had to be honest with her husband and tell him what God had told her, but was afraid to because she had fears of abandonment?

 We know Isaac's history. Isaac saw firsthand how his father Abraham abandoned Hagar and his half-brother Ishmael, and he saw how Abraham was ready to take Isaac's life. If Rebecca was living in a society that allowed her to voice her fears, do we think tender Isaac would have scoffed at her and rejected her?

Jacob and Esau were contenders at birth, each with different needs and personalities. Jacob spent time in tents (Gen. 25:27), which the Midrash interprets as schools. Esau loved hunting. Jacob, their father, loved Esau because Esau brought Isaac fresh "game for his mouth, but Rebecca loved Jacob" (Gen. 25:28).

According to the Torah, Jacob was preparing a red lentil stew when Esau came in from the field. The famished Esau demanded that Jacob give him some of the stew. Jacob agreed under the provision that Esau would sell Jacob his birthright. Esau agreed, as he thought he was "going to die" (Gen. 25:32). The Talmud in Tractate Bava Batra 16B says that Jacob's stew was a shiva meal to comfort his father Isaac who had just buried Abraham. Ramban (Nachmanides of 13th-century Spain) says that Esau thought his life was almost over because of a hunting accident that day. The two brothers did not communicate well. Isaac wanted nothing to do with Esau's hunting. Esau wanted nothing to do with Isaac's studying. If they spoke assertively to each other about their likes and dislikes, as well as their strengths and weaknesses, an arrangement might have been reached. Two of Jacob's sons reached such an agreement years later. Zebulun agreed to be a merchant seaman, allowing Issachar to remain home and study.

Does it not seem reasonable that Jacob could have accepted the spiritual birthright of Isaac, while Esau accepted the material birthright? Could not a sharing have taken place? The Torah paints Esau literally red and calls him Edom (red in Hebrew). The sages paint Esau bloody red and say he is pure evil. But the Torah does not say this. Isaac loved Esau. Could Esau have been all that bad? Was Isaac, the son of Abraham, such a glutton that he would overlook evil in his own tent just for a taste of meat? Of course not. Hence we have another situation where two people did not express their needs to each other, and instead of relating to each other as people, they related to each other as objects.

Some time later, Isaac has dealings with the Philistine king, Abimelech. This is the same king with whom Abraham made a treaty by which Abraham was given permission to dig wells in Philistia. Isaac goes to Philistia, as there is a famine in Canaan. During this time, Isaac became "great and kept becoming greater until he was very great" (Gen. 26:13). "The Philistines envied him" (Gen. 26:14). Instead of the Philistines discussing their concerns with Isaac, they aggressively clog up the wells. Isaac digs two new wells, but the Philistines protest and say, "the water is ours" (Gen. 26:20). Isaac names these two wells "contention" (Esek) and "enmity" (Sitnah). Isaac digs a third well, which they do not contest. Isaac calls this well "Rehoboth" (Gen. 26:22). Rehoboth means "spaciousness."

Both Isaac and Abimelech are powerful men, yet they toy with each other like children in a kindergarten sandbox. If Abimelech had said to Isaac that he was envious of Isaac's wealth and wanted to learn Isaac's herding secrets, would Isaac not have shared them with Abimelech? If Abraham was able to work out a treaty with Abimelech, couldn't Isaac have done so also? Here is a case of two more people with an it-it relationship. Abimelech sees Isaac only as a potential commercial threat. Isaac sees Abimelech only as a landowner that he will use until the famine in Canaan is ended. Both of their tribes could have worked out a mutually beneficial commercial agreement, just as the descendents of Isaac, the children of Israel, will hopefully soon be able to work out with the nominal descendents of the Philistines.

The parasha's denouement comes with Rebecca's scheme to deceive her husband, Isaac, and steal from Esau. Again, instead of having an honest talk with her husband about her needs, she plots for Jacob to dress up as Esau and steal Esau's blessing from the blinded Isaac. The ruse works, but only for a few moments. Esau and Isaac uncover the plot too late. Esau swears that he will kill Jacob (Gen. 27:41). Jacob escapes to his uncle Laban's home. Years of two brothers and two spouses not being able to talk, share, or express their needs, boils over into an ugly scene. The ramifications are enormous.

As we will read in the next parasha, Laban also treats Jacob like an object. He tricks Jacob into marrying Leah although Jacob wants Rachel. Years later, Jacob favors Rachel's son Joseph over Leah's sons, who are older than Joseph. What happens? Joseph is sold into slavery in Egypt. Jacob and his other sons travel to Egypt and stay there because Joseph is Viceroy. Within a generation or so, the Children of Jacob become slaves in Egypt. The Talmud says this is why we say at Passover that an "Aramean (Laban) sought to kill our father." The rabbis blame Laban for the switching of his daughters. They blame Laban for the aftermath of Joseph becoming the favorite son, causing the eventual slavery in Egypt.

I posit that the blame goes back further. If Rebecca lived in an atmosphere were she felt she could express her need to reassure her bond with Isaac, she could have spoken with Isaac honestly. She could have told Isaac that God told her about the warring twins in her womb, without Isaac abandoning her. They would have been able, as communicating parents, to raise Jacob and Esau in such a way that would meet both sons' needs. If they were loving brothers, able to feel love equally from each parent, Jacob would have been glad to offer Esau some lunch without the fee of the birthright. Esau would have acknowledged his skills and weaknesses, and accepted Isaac as the spiritual leader. Isaac could have accepted Esau as the commercial leader. There would have been no need to for Jacob to steal Esau's blessing. There would have been no need for Jacob to run to uncle Laban. There would have been no need for Jacob and his sons to go down to Egypt where they end up as slaves. Jacob's descendants and the Philistines' possible descendants, who are called Palestinians, could have lived together in peace in the Middle East, and not be taking up so much headline space today. But as the Yiddish saying teaches: "if my bubbie had a moustache, she would be my zadie."

Too many vulnerable Jews in too many places around the world hesitate to look to their temples for assistance in their hour of need. Resolutions and statements cannot change this reality. Only action can. Every one of us is vulnerable at one time or another. Every one of us will have an hour of need. We are supposed to emulate God. God clothed Adam and Eve when they were naked. He consoled Hagar, Sarah, and so many others. He fed the Israelites manna and quail in the wilderness of Sinai. He buried Moses.

Abraham performs acts of loving kindness continually. He never said that his nephew Lot was "needy." Abraham even interrupted his conversation with God Almighty to "run" in the "heat of the day" to take care of the needs of three strangers. He did not even let the pain from his recent circumcision slow him. When we call somebody needy we are really saying that we are too involved with our own lives to take the time to tend to this person's needs. It is easy to help someone with a simple need that we can handle with a quick phone call. Afterward, we can feel so self-important that we did a mitzvah. But the real mitzvah is developing an I-Thou relationship with someone in need. It is easy to do good deeds for strangers. There is no emotional expense involved. It is having a temporary, I-it relationship. It is only a step away from checkbook Judaism.

Martin Buber discussed his theory of relationships in his book I-Thou. I-Thou relationships are mutual relationships of love and caring. It is the type of relationship that we should strive for with God and with loved ones. Buber acknowledges that most people have to struggle to master I-Thou relationships with spouses and family members. Most of the world relates to each other as objects, which Buber calls I-It relationships. New writers have called these Win-Lose relationships while I-Thou relations have been called Win-Win. In transactional therapeutic terms an I-Thou relationship is defined as Adult-Adult or "I'm Ok. You're Ok."

Stanford University psychiatrist Dr. David Spiegel has done research on the difference that sincere social support can make when living with illness. Dr. Spiegel created psychosocial support groups for women with metastatic breast cancer. All of the women eventually died, as their cancers were aggressive. But the women who had attended the support groups lived twice as long as the women who did not attend the groups. Caring I-Thou relationships can save lives.

Each Shabbat, we pray to God to give us, or someone we know, "healing of body and renewal of spirit." We know that God helps those that help themselves. We have the power in our Temples to transform people's wellbeing. Studies have shown how frequent attendance at religious services, where there is true fellowship, is linked to greater health in people with diseases ranging from cardiovascular problems to cancers. Another study showed that true Spirituality has reduced high blood pressure, even in men who smoke cigarettes.

In his book, The Relaxation Response, Dr. Herbert Benson determines that meditation evokes a state of relaxation in the body. It affects respiration, heart rate, blood pressure, muscle tension and brain function. Other studies have shown that meditation in a group is more effective that meditation alone. Other studies have shown that communal prayer, with what we call kavenah (concentrated attention) in Judaism, produces a similar effect. All of these studies also show that individuals in these groups must relate to each other openly and lovingly. If there is no sense of security, one cannot achieve the relaxation response in meditation, or kavenah in prayer.

Psychiatrist Victor Frankel writes about the importance of meaning in our lives. Other philosophers write about how connections in our lives give it meaning. When we feel connected to the Godhead, in a state of spirituality, we do not feel alone. When we feel connected to a group, like fellow congregants in our temples, we achieve an enhanced ability to cope and to heal. Wellness can be maintained when one feels connected to something larger that oneself writes Rabbi Amy Eilberg, whose ideas are sprinkled throughout this D'var Torah. When we feel connected to a loving community, to truth, to history, and to God, our needs and fears seem smaller.

Religion may act as a placebo but we should not negate the power of a placebo or the power of the mind to heal. Dr. Kevin Pauza and others have shown that merely believing a treatment will work helps alleviate an array of symptoms. Patients with back pain were told they needed back surgery. Half had the surgery under anesthesia. The other half, were anesthetized, but just had the incision made in their back and did not have the surgery. Yet both groups were told they did have the back surgery. Thirty percent of the patients who had the placebo surgery got better. Our convictions that we are connected to Jewish people presently and throughout history really may strengthen us.

Judaism presently has a rich armamentarium of resources to strengthen our spirit when life brings us challenges. The soothing words of the Psalms are an excellent example. Rituals such as Tashlich (casting our sins upon the water in the form of bread on Rosh Hashanah), Shabbat candle lighting, and doing mitzvah are ways that we can symbolically cast away unhealthy habits, look for sources of light and hope, and help those that have needs greater than ours. The sages knew that visiting the ill (bikur cholem) can make a difference in another's experience of illness. But the sages said that the visitor brings his own experiences to the ill person. The visitor has to open up and bring his own hopes and fears, as well as 100 percent of his capacity for love and compassion in order to make a difference.

Many congregations presently have healing services. Some actively visit people in hospitals. One congregation, Beth Shalom in San Francisco, adopted a local hospital and sends volunteers regularly. But our temples can do much more. We can actually prevent illness. In their book, Successful Aging, Drs. John Rowe and Robert Kahn state that socially connected people live longer and are sick less often. They say that connections mean sincere I-Thou relationships. People without strong connections to groups, such as synagogues, were four to six times more apt to die, regardless of race, wealth, activity or healthcare. True love helps prevent pain and illness. People who said they did not get displays of affection from their friends were 20 times more likely to develop chest pain than those people who had friends that demonstrated affection and caring.

"All Israel is responsible for one another," the rabbis teach. As this Torah portion's title suggests, we are all God's offspring (toledot). We are all family. All of us have needs. Expressing these needs and having others listen to them is healthy for both the listener and the speaker. It reminds us that we are connected. It gives us all a chance to do mitzvoth to help each other and reminds us that we are part of a community that will help us when our time of need arrives. Disregarding someone in his or her time of need is something we cannot imagine Abraham doing. It is a core value of Judaism to help those in need. Some of these needs seem enormous, others much smaller. None of us is immune to having needs. The aim of our religion and our temples is to allow people to expand their relationships and grow emotionally and spiritually. Our synagogues can be true sanctuaries from life's travails.

This Haftarah is from the Book of Malachi. A few verses after this portion, the prophet writes: "Have we all not one father? Hath not one God created us all? Why do we deal treacherously every man against his brother, profaning the covenant of our fathers?" (Mal. 2:10). Certainly our congregations are far from being the kind of place that Malachi describes. We are blessed to have caring and compassionate congregations all over the world. We are blessed to have rabbis leading us down a righteous path. If yours is lacking, lead the way. The Mishna tells us, that "in a place where there are no leaders, be a leader." Let us strive to continue this good work and even do better. As we do Tikkun Olam (repair of the world), we will hopefully come to the day, as Malachi says (3:12), when "all nations shall call us happy for we shall be a delightful land."

Shabbat Shalom:

Many Blessings,
Rabbi Arthur Segal
www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org
Via Shamash Org on-line class service
Jewish Renewal
Jewish Spiritual Renewal
Jewish Spirituality
Eco Judaism
Hilton Head Island, SC, Bluffton, SC, Savannah, GA

-

 Rabbi Arthur Segal reveals the path to Jewish Spiritual Renewal - and happiness in  troubled  times...

Is Joy and Happiness
Still Possible in
Times Like These?

Joyous Jewish Musicians (Copyright Steve Greenberg*)

YES, it is possible. Even when the world seems to be turning upside-down, you can follow a simple, step-by-step process that will have you loving life every day no matter what is going on around you. It's no secret, but nobody's been talking about it for generations...until now.

In His New Book:

http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/
THE HANDBOOK TO JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:
A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew

Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal brings Judaism back to its roots for the millions of modern Jews who have become disenchanted with "normative" Judaism.

In The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew, Segal reveals how Judaism leads you up the path to a happy, fulfilling life.

And he casts aside the long, boring sermons and tedious litany of rules and regulations in favor of plain English, humor, and life examples that we can all relate to.

          Click Here to Order
          $19.99
          254 Pages
          Published by Amazon's BookSurge
          ISBN: 1439223394

          "The Handbook To Jewish Spiritual Renewal by Rabbi Arthur Segal has given me the foundation to approach each day with honesty, reverence, hope and gratitude. I feel like I am having a personal conversation with a wise prophet with a jovial sense of humor." 

          Diane Weinberg,
          Washington, D.C.


          Shalom.

          My name is Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal, and in my years of rabbinic counseling I've met an awful lot of fellow Jews who are short on faith that Judaism can deliver the happiness and joy that it promises, especially in these turbulent times.

          Their emotions run the gamut: sadness, loneliness, bitterness; fearfulness of what the future holds for them. Some are just downright cynical and angry.

          I've been there myself; stuck with a feeling of, "Is this all there is?"

          But I found the way out.

          That's why I became a rabbi after retiring from my dental practice; to help others up the path to a life of joy and freedom that I couldn't find in "normative" Judaism.

          I want to show you that path today.

          "You lead the spiritual practices of the entire program and offer our followers a unique spiritual opportunity." 

          Hune Margulies, Ph.D.
          Founder, Martin Buber Institute

          Reclaim Your Spirituality...And Your Life

          http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/main.sc
          Click to Order
          THE HANDBOOK TO JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:
          A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew

          Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal distills millennia of sage advice into a step-by-step process to reclaim your Judaism and your spirituality in a concise easy-to-read and easy-to-follow manner.

          If you find yourself wishing for the strength to sustain you through the ups and downs of life; if you want to learn how to live life to its fullest without angst, worry, low self-esteem or fear; or if you wish that your relationships with family, friends and co-workers were based on love and service and free of ego, arguments, resentments and feelings of being unloved...this book is for you.

          Price: $19.99
          254 Pages
          Published by: Amazon's BookSurge

          In The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew, I distill teachings from our sages that have been passed along for thousands of years, along with lessons from the Torah and the Talmud.

          But unlike other Jewish spiritual texts that you may have read, or sermons you may have heard, this book presents these lessons in a concise, easy-to-read, easy-to-follow life transformation process that you can follow step-by-step at your own pace.

          And it is written in plain English with relevance to the modern world. I even threw in a few jokes to make it fun!

          This is stuff we were not taught in Hebrew school or in most synagogues, but it is what Judaism is really all about. 

          "Wonderful stuff! I'm savoring it, bit by bit." 

          Samuel Hughes, Senior Editor
          The Pennsylvania Gazette
          University of Pennsylvania

          In The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew, you will learn:

          • That "normative" Judaism as you have known it throughout your life is not really Judaism at all, why it may leave you uninspired, and how spiritual renewal will help you recapture that inspiration (Chapter 1).

          • That your ego is your own worst enemy, and how to win the battle against it (Chapter 2).

          • How to stop struggling for control over things you cannot control, and be happier because of it (Chapter 3).

          • How spiritual renewal conquers the fears and character flaws that are holding you back in life (Chapters 4 and 5).

          • To actually get rid of your character flaws forever (Chapter 6).

          • How to turn negative relationships in your life positive (Chapter 7).

          • How simple it is to make prayer a regular part of your days...without going back to Hebrew school (Chapter 8).

          • How to to find peace of mind through meditation (Chapter 9).

          • How to simplify life's toughest decisions (Chapter 10).

          • How spiritual renewal transforms you into the best individual you can be, and how to stay on track (Chapter 11).

          • How to celebrate the Sabbath and the Jewish Holidays with meaning (Chapters 12 and 13).

          • How to live with happiness, joy, and freedom every day of your life (Chapter 14).
          http://www.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/images/Handbook_Covers.pdf
          Click Image
          to Enlarge
          THE HANDBOOK TO JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:
          A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew

          Price: $19.99
          254 Pages
          Published by: Amazon's BookSurge

          A Question for You

          Let me ask you a question: Are you enjoying life like the people in the cartoon at the top of this letter?

          Or, do you spend your days worrying about the economy...

          ...in conflict with friends, family, and co-workers...

          ...stressed out about the future?

          If the latter sounds like you I'm not surprised. As I said earlier, I counsel many fellow Jews who are in the same boat, and they look to their Jewish faith to find a happier life.

          However...

          Some have trouble understanding what they read in the Torah and how it relates to their own lives.

          Others find that their synagogues are more about social climbing and fundraising and less about spiritual awakening.

          Many simply give up, believing that Judaism has failed them, and they walk away from their Jewish faith. 

          In my book, The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern JewI will show you that true Judaism has not failed them...or you...and that you can return to your Jewish faith and enjoy your life to its fullest, even when the news of the day keeps going from bad to worse.

          "I couldn't have written the book or expressed my pain and concern for the Jewish people returning to Judaism. Thank God that He put this desire in your heart."

          Janelle Vechi
          California

          It's simpler than you may think, and you don't have to become a rabbi as I did.

          To give you an idea what I am talking about, here is an excerpt from The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew:

          We become so far removed from God, our loving Sovereign Parent, that when we pray, (if we pray at all), we pray to meet an immediate need. We desire an immediate fix, rather than to seek renewal (return) and the wisdom to work toward renewal. We are satisfied for a moment if our trivial need is met. We therefore never achieve happiness in the long term. We are constantly searching and striving for our secular notions of success and happiness. While in this all-too-common state our egos "lock horns" with the egos of others, putting us in a sustained state of human conflict and resentment.

           

          This is not the Jewish way to live; but most of us cannot find the way out. In this book, I will give a map to the tools of the process in simple terms and in language easily understood, to turn your life around to a much more pleasant state. If you follow the map faithfully and honestly, you will find that the journey is life-changing and life-affirming.

          "Nice Rabbi Segal! Thank you! Peace."

          Deepak Chopra's Intent.com

          What Would You Say Something Like This is Worth?

          Think about it…

          The teachings of the Torah and the Talmud all distilled into an easy-to-read, easy-to-understand, and easy-to-follow step-by-step process that will help you:

          • Overcome the challenges that life throws at you every day
          • Stop letting ego, resentment, and other conflict strain your relationships with family, friends, and co-workers
          • Get the angst and worry out of your life
          • Eliminate low self-esteem from your life
          • Overcome your fear of failure and other fears

          I know it sounds priceless and in reality…it is. But I sincerely want to share what has helped me and countless others with you.

          In other words, I want to show you the path to the happy and joyous life that your were meant to live. So I want you to have The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew for only $19.99.

          "The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal is an invaluable resource for anyone who is searching for more in their life. I was involved with organized Jewish religion, but something was always missing. Using this guide, and taking each chapter to heart, has transformed my views and put me on the track my life is supposed to be on,  filled with love, trust and emunah (faith). Thanks Rabbi Segal!"

          Ben Pincus
          Houston, TX

          Like I said, I've been where you are: in a life missing spirituality; seemingly unable to cope with life's difficulties; and unable to find peace and inner shalom. 

          But I found it and now I want to share with you the path that I have found and passed on to others with consistent success.

          It took me many years of work and study, and rabbinic ordination. But it didn't have to. And it doesn't have to for you. You can travel the same path that I did, but you can do it in only 254 pages!

          We are living in a historically turbulent time. Economic uncertainty, political corruption, threats of aggression, and religious conflict are everywhere. I know that I would find it difficult to find comfort without the peace and inner shalom that I have found through Jewish Spiritual Renewal.

          Please join me now.
          Start your journey UP the path of Jewish Spiritual Renewal so that it may bring the same joy, happiness, freedom and shalom that I now enjoy into your own life!

          http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/main.sc 

          Click Here to Order

          Many Blessings,
          Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal

           

          P.S.  Another thing that I've noticed over the years in my Rabbinic Counseling is that many modern Jews are not as familiar with the Torah and the Talmud as they might be. 

          They find it difficult to understand and interpret in a way that makes sense and has relevance to their lives in the modern world. 

          This is quite often the root cause of the kind of spiritual disconnection that I described earlier.

          So, as a companion to The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew, I have also written:

          http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/main.sc
          Click to Order
          A SPIRITUAL AND ETHICAL COMPENDIUM
          TO THE TORAH AND TALMUD

          Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal dissects each of the Torah's weekly sections (parashot) using the Talmud and other rabbinic texts to show the true Jewish take on what the Torah is trying to teach us. This companion to The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew brings the Torah alive with daily relevance to the Modern Jew.

          All of the Torah can be summed up in one word: Chesed. It means kindness. The Talmud teaches that the Torah is about loving our fellow man and that we are to go and study. The rest is commentary. This compendium clarifies the commentary and allows one to study Torah and Talmud to learn the Judaic ideals of love, forgiveness, kindness, mercy and peace. A must read for all Jews and deserves a place in every Jewish home.

          Price: $24.99
          494 Pages
          Published by: Amazon's BookSurge

          "Very informative and timely. It allows many people to benefit from Torah lessons, where many of them may not otherwise have an opportunity receive such content."

          Mauricio Benzipporah
          Founder, Beta-Gershom Organization

          A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud dissects each of the Torah's weekly sections (parashot) using the Talmud and other rabbinic texts to interpret its lessons.

          "Shalom. What a blessing your insights have given me. I am interested in reading more of your writings of Talmud. I find it difficult to find good Talmudic readings. Excellent work, Rabbi!"

          Rabbi Daniel Ben Shmuel

          A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud brings the Torah alive with daily relevance to the Modern Jew.

          All of Torah can be summed up in one word: Chesed. It means kindness. The Talmud teaches that the Torah is about loving our fellow man and that we are to ''go and study.'' The rest is commentary. 

          A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud clarifies the commentary and allows one to study the Torah and the Talmud to learn the Judaic ideals of love, forgiveness, kindness, mercy and peace. 

          It is a must read for those seeking Jewish Spiritual Renewal and is the ideal complement to The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew.

          Here is an excerpt from A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud:

          Since each parasha is the weekly Torah portion, you may read each of the chapters in the book during the course of a week while also reading the actual Torah portion. By doing so, you will learn a modern Jewish Spiritual view of each Torah portion. At the same time, your world will be open to the ethical teachings of the Talmud.

           

          While many read the Torah as a history book, or a deed to land, or see it as a boring book full of legalisms and ritual for a priesthood that no longer exists, this book aims to show you the spiritual ethical lessons in each parasha. In a sense this book will hopefully help you enjoy reading and understanding the Five Books of Moses, what we call Chumash from the Hebrew word for "five." You may even discover that you want to continue your study with the Talmud and other Jewish texts.

          "...most insightful (Torah) essay I could find was written by Rabbi Arthur Segal."

          Leslie Palma-Simoncek
          Staten Island Advance

          Complete your journey UP the path to Jewish Spiritual Renewal with a better understanding of the Torah's lessons through A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud for only $24.99...

          ...certainly a small amount to pay for the priceless wisdom contained within the Torah and the Talmud.

          You can purchase each book individually, but if you purchase them together as a set, I will donate a portion of the sales price in your name to a tzadakkah of your choice, such as your synagogue. Think of it as your first act of loving kindness in your spiritually renewed life!

           

          http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/main.sc 

          Click Here to Order

           


          http://www.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/images/Handbook_Covers.pdf
          Click Image
          to Enlarge
          THE HANDBOOK TO JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL:
          A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew

          Price: $19.99
          254 Pages
          Published by: Amazon's BookSurge


          http://www.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/images/Compendium_Covers.pdf
          Click Image
          to Enlarge
          A SPIRITUAL AND ETHICAL COMPENDIUM
          TO THE TORAH AND TALMUD

          Price: $24.99
          494 Pages
          Published by: Amazon's BookSurge

           

          About Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal

          Rabbi Dr. Arthur Segal's love of Judaism and his Ahavath Israel led him on his personal quest for Jewish Spiritual Renewal, beginning his studies after retirement from a successful oral medicine practice. Rabbi Segal graduated cum laude with BA and DMD degrees, Specialty, and Post-Doctoral studies in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania in the 1970s. He is an author in these chosen fields as well.

          Rabbi Segal teaches classes on Jewish Spiritual Renewal and The Spiritual and Ethical Teachings of the Torah, TaNaK and Talmud via the Shamash online program. He teaches Torah, Talmud, and other great texts, such as Duties of the Heart by Ibn Pakudah of 1050 C.E. Spain, to adults in his hometown. Rabbi Dr. Segal does rabbinic counseling using the step-by-step process of Jewish Spiritual Renewal to help his fellow Jews achieve a spiritual life.

           

          http://www.shop.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/main.sc 

          Click Here to Order


          ©2009 Dr. Arthur Segal, P.A. d/b/a Rabbi Arthur Segal 

          Page header image is courtesy of Steve Greenberg (greenberg-art.com)

           
           


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