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Rabbi Arthur Segal’s love of people, humanity, and Judaism has him sharing with others “The Wisdom of the Ages” that has been passed on to him. His writings for modern Jews offer Spiritual, Ethical, and eco-Judaic lessons in plain English and with relevance to contemporary lifestyles. He is the author of countless articles, editorials, letters, and blog posts, and he has recently published two books:

The Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern Jew

and

A Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud

You can learn more about these books at:

www.JewishSpiritualRenewal.org
ALL ENTRIES ARE (C) AND PUBLISHED BY RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL, INC, AND NOT BY ANY INDIVIDUAL EMPLOYEE OF SAID CORPORATION. THIS APPLIES TO 3 OTHER BLOGS (CHUMASH, ECO, SPIRITUALITY) AND WEB SITES PUBLISHED BY SAID CORPORATION.
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Thursday, January 19, 2012

RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH DESTINATION WEDDINGS: INTERFAITH: BLUFFTON, SC

 
RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH DESTINATION WEDDINGS: INTERFAITH:  BLUFFTON, SC
 
 
Jewish  Spiritual  Renewal:
  
  Derek  Eretz Zuta + Rabbah:
  
 Shabbat  1/28/12 
 
 (aka  Derech  Eretz )
  
 
  
Shalom  my dear Chaverim, Talmidim, v' Rabbanim, friends, students and fellow rabbis: 
  
An oneg, joy-filled, Shabbat this coming weekend to all.   
  
We continue with our exploration into the Talmudic Tractates of Derek Eretz Zuta and Rabbah. (aka Derech Eretz Zuta, aka Derech Eretz Rabbah.  As was mentioned, zuta is Aramaic for 'small', and rabbah is 'large').
  
Remember that Derek Eretz is not about Jewish ritual. It is  about how we are to treat one another and what traits of character, middot, we  are to try to develop. The lessons are universal and ecumenical. The  development of character traits and Jewish spiritual renewal  transformation is called  Mussar.
  
For  those new to the class Baruch ha Ba! Welcome! You can access last  week's class at  Rabbi Arthur Segal: RABBI ARTHUR SEGAL: JEWISH SPIRITUAL RENEWAL: AVOIDING A CONFEDERACY OF DUNCES  
 
  
From  here you will find links to preceding classes in this series. So, together we continue:
  
 TALMUD  BAVLI
  
 TRACTATE 
  
 DEREk ERETZ  ZUTA
  
 (aka  Derech  Eretz)
  
Today we will continued with  CHAPTER 6 of Talmud  Bavli Tractate Derek Eretz Zuta Verse  6:2.    
 
6:2 ''When entering, the greater shall be first; when leaving, the smaller shall be first. When ascending steps, the greater shall be first; when descending, the smaller shall be the first. At a public meeting, the greater shall have the preference. When entering a prison, the smaller shall do so first. For saying benedictions, the greater is first. The one entering the house must always greet first the one who is in the house. One must not lean at meals (as was the custom in the Orient) when a greater man than he is at the table. One shall not drink in public unless he turns away his face from the bystanders. "
 
I understand that the above can read like a Jewish "Emily Post.'' It discuses  decorum and respect shown to elders and teachers. The lessons  from Talmudic times  are equally valuable today, although many times ignored. They are all to teach us humility.
 
"''When entering, the greater shall be first; when leaving, the smaller shall be first.'' When we enter a room and we are with an elder, a rabbi, or one of our teachers, kavod, honor, is shown by allowing the greater in stature to enter first, and then leave last. We need to remember the adage in Pirkei Avot, of: "Who is honored? He who honors others.'' When we turn the above upside down, and precede ahead of one deserving honor, we show not only disrespect, but display our bad manners and arrogance.
 
Unfortunately when this disrespect is done in synagogues, especially those who think of rabbis as hired help, rabbinic teachings become disrespected as well. In fact, this is one of the main reasons this commentary on Derek Eretz has been studied for years and then written. Without Derek Eretz, again from Pirkei Avot, there is no Torah learning.
 
"When ascending steps, the greater shall be first; when descending, the smaller shall be the first."  We see the  same progression with stairs as we do with entering rooms. Entering a room, just as ascending stairs, is the more important act. So we show kavod to the 'greater.' Descending stairs as with leaving a room, is a less important act, and hence the 'smaller' goes first.
 
''At a public meeting, the greater shall have the preference.'' How often do we see folks with low self esteem have their egos try to take over meetings, making long statements when they are to be asking short questions? It is proper decorum to give all honor and preference to the 'greater' person in the assembly. We can learn more when we take the cotton out of our ears, and place it in our mouths. The Talmud teaches that a jar with one or two coins in it, when rattled, makes much more noise than a jar tightly packed with coins.
 
 " For saying benedictions, the greater is first. " When dinning it is important to let the scholar or rabbi make the beracoth, blessings. In my home, my guests are given this honor. It is just another occasion when we can show chesed as well as kavod to another person. The Talmud spends many dafs (folios,pages) discussing this in Tractate Beracoth. Tractate Derek Eretz Zuta states it simply and succinctly.
 
''The one entering the house must always greet first the one who is in the house. '' This act is showing respect to the host. How often do we see the opposite behavior, of guests congregating at the front vestibule chatting with each other, and not greeting their host? By following the above we are given an opportunity to thank our host and wish blessings upon the host. We can hobnob  with our fellow guests afterwards.
 
''One must not lean at meals (as was the custom in the Orient) when a greater man than he is at the table.''  When we are dinning with a 'greater' person, we need to sit upright and be attentive. There can be plenty of time for leaning, and relaxing later on. We are showing non-verbally that we respect our elders and teachers, and that we are attentive and wish to hear some pearls of wisdom. By immediately leaning, we are implying we are equals and we have nothing to learn. We show lack of humility as well as breeding. The Talmud tells us that a boor cannot fear sin, meaning a person with rude, clumsy manners and little refinement, who leans at a table while dinning, cannot effectively learn Torah. None of us wish to appear as an am ha eretz. (Ironically the derivation for boor is from the German gebur, a peasant farmer. Am ha eretz literally means a person of the earth).
 
"One shall not drink in public unless he turns away his face from the bystanders." Judaism has nothing against the use of alcohol. In fact, most if not all Jewish holy day meals, including Shabbat, begin with drinking wine and thanking God for it. In fact, the Passover seder has 4 cups of wine mandated in  the service for each adult person.  
 
Public drunkenness is frowned upon. But Judaism has its exceptions. During Purim one is commanded to get so drunk so as not to be able to distinguish between "Blessed is Mordechai" and "Cursed is Haman." The Talmud tends to lesson this ruling with a story of how one rabbi while drunk accidentally slashed his friend, causing him to almost die. When the healed friend was invited back for Purim a year later, he declined, not wanting to push his luck.
 
So the above verse is telling us if we are drinking in public, e.g. a bar, and not a dinner, to hide our faces. This again is for ma'arit ayin reasons. We do not want people seeing us have one small drink and assume we have been in the bar for hours consuming cases of liquor.
 
Besides giving people the opportunity to bad mouth us, we are also not giving one the opportunity to look at us as an object of Chillul Ha Shem, hollowing out God's holy name. When some people know we are Jews, and/or rabbis, and they see us doing what they think are improper behaviors, it can effect their attitudes to all Jews, to Judaism, and to God Himself.
 
We discuss these middot, character traits of mar'rit ayin and avoid arguing with people, throughout the majority of chapters in  ''The  Handbook to Jewish Spiritual Renewal: A Path of Transformation for the Modern  Jew'' ' (http://www.jewishspiritualrenewal.net/ )  as well as in most chapters of ''A  Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and Talmud''  
  
What are your ideas about these adages of decorum?  How has learning Talmud's Derek Eretz helped you in your  interpersonal  relationships? How  has understanding the spiritual and ethical teachings of  Judaism helped you live a more joyous life? 
  
Next class, Baruch ha Shem, we will continue with Derek Eretz Zuta, Chapter Six. Thank you for joining me.
 
For those who want a d'var Torah on Parasha Bo   from '''A  Spiritual and Ethical Compendium to the Torah and  Talmud'' please click on

 

 

Shabbat Shalom:

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Maker  of Shalom (Oseh Shalom) help make us deserving of Shalom beyond all human comprehension!!